The Matrix versus Carl Sagan

"Ever wondered if scientist Carl Sagan and Agent Smith from The Matrix might be the same person somehow? I redubbed a scene from the Matrix to prove the point!"

Datagate advert

In the wake of the latest government I.T. fiasco, I spotted this advert on a number of blogs:

Captain Obvious

Captain Obvious has moved on to become a reporter (pic)

Life Sized X-Wing Launch - What really happened

Moonwalking Mannequin Bird

Ig Nobel Awards 2007

The annual awards for quirky and off-beat science research with handed out by the Annals of Improbable Research at Harvard University.

Some of the winners included:

• Spanish scientists who found that rats sometimes could not distinguish between Japanese spoken backwards and Dutch spoken backwards.


• An Australian woman who documented the indexing problems caused by the word "the."


• A Japanese researcher who extracted vanilla flavoring from cow dung.


• A Taiwanese man who patented a Batman-like device that drops a net over bank robbers.

Further info:
MSNBC
Slashdot
Google News

Family Guy Star Wars

Bash.org joke

Via bash.org

[Snausages] So, an E-flat, a G-flat, and a B-flat walk into a bar.
[Snausages] And the bartender says,
[Snausages] "I'm sorry, we don't serve minors."
[Myke] That struck a chord.
[Snausages] Careful with those puns, you'll get in treble.
[Myke] But they're key to my humour.
[Myke] And very noteworthy.

The Simpsonizer

If you want to turn yourself into a Simpsons character then try out the Simpsonizer
(traffic might be heavy, so if you can't get onto it , try again later)

hat tip: Wired blog

Sims Disco Duck

When NOT to hyphenate your name - the sequel [PICS]

Following on from the highly popular When not to hyphenate your name, which was Dugg to death, here's the sequel.

When not to hyphenate your name

update: Hello Reddit!. Thanks for upmodding this.

update 2: Hello Diggers. Over 1,500 diggs and rising. Thanks!

Where the hell is Matt?

Cow Socialism

Hat tip :Rick O'Shea's Breakfast Blog

SOCIALISM:You have 2 cows, and you give one to your neighbour.

COMMUNISM:You have 2 cows. The State takes both and gives you some milk.

FASCISM:You have 2 cows. The State takes both and sells you some milk.

NAZISM:You have 2 cows. The State takes both and shoots you.

BUREAUCRATISM:You have 2 cows. The State takes both, shoots one, milks the other, and then throws the milk away...

TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM:You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull.Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the income.

SURREALISM:You have two giraffes. The government requires you to take harmonica lessons.

AN AMERICAN CORPORATION:You have two cows.You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows.Later, you hire a consultant to analyse why the cow has dropped dead.

ENRON VENTURE CAPITALISM:You have two cows.You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows. The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island Company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all seven cows back to your listed company. The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more.Sell one cow to buy a new president of the United States, leaving you with nine cows. No balance sheet provided with the release. The public buys your bull.

A FRENCH CORPORATION:You have two cows.You go on strike, organise a riot, and block the roads, because you want three cows.

A JAPANESE CORPORATION:You have two cows.You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk.You then create a clever cow cartoon image called 'Cowkimon' and market it worldwide.

A GERMAN CORPORATION:You have two cows.You re-engineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves.

AN ITALIAN CORPORATION:You have two cows, but you don't know where they are. You decide to have lunch.

A RUSSIAN CORPORATION:You have two cows.You count them and learn you have five cows. You count them again and learn you have 42 cows.You count them again and learn you have 2 cows. You stop counting cows because your sobering up and open another bottle of vodka.

A CHINESE CORPORATION:You have two cows. You have 300 people milking them. You claim that you have full employment, and high bovine productivity, and arrest the newsman who report the real situation.

AN IRAQI CORPORATION:Everyone thinks you have lots of cows.You tell them that you have none.No-one believes you, so they bomb the sh*t out of you and invade your country. You still have no cows, but now you're a "democracy"....

THE POLISH GOVERNMENT:You have two cows. You lecture one on how turning gay will mean the end of cattle. The other cow emigrates.

CHELSEA FOOTBALL CLUB:You have two cows and twentysomething overpaid donkeys. Everyone hates you.

THE WELSH:You have two cows. You try not to look too disappointed.

AN IRISH ENTREPRENEUR:You have two cows. You borrow against future headage payments to develop your land. The cows can live in flat 62. In Bulgaria.

AN IRISH RURAL DWELLER:You have two cows. An Taisce object.

THE IRISH TIMES:You have two cows. They don't always agree with you. What sort of cattle are they?

THE SUNDAY INDEPENDENT:You have two cows. You start sleeping with one of them. A column follows.

FINE GAEL:You have two cows and, by God, a CONTRACT for two more!

PROGRESSIVE DEMOCRATS:You have two cows. The others were destroyed by an ungrateful public.You're not quite sure if two is enough to maintain an actual farm.

SINN FÉIN:You have two cows, not enough green fields, and lots and lots of sheep.

THE GREENS:You have two cows and an extensive portfolio of equity interests in various American food and beverage corporations. You sell these and pay child actors to pretend they want adults to vote for you.

FIANNA FÁIL:You had two cows. Due to separation proceedings with your one-time heifers, you dodge any questions on your finances.

Socialist Party:You have two cows. You keep one and pay the other to your party. This keeps you in touch with ordinary working farmers who have only one cow. The other farmers ignore or patronise you.

THE H.S.E.:You have two cows. They go on strike.

Programming languages

Spotted this in the comments on Losing big is easy - a blogpost about badly named computer languages (and its quite funny too)

Christopher said...

Cool, great names for future programming languages:

- Rockefeller
- Capone
- Patton
- Shark
- Fire
- Arrow
- Ring
- Eagle


Example:

Woah, my boss asked me is I could take over the project from Mike, and I said"sure", because Mike used Rockefeller extensively, along with the Capone toolkit (the one where all the class names start with GUN), and I could just bring in my Patton web services, link it with routines written in Shark by Ellie in Financial Services.

Of course, the web server is written in Fire 2.2, with Arrow modules, and uses Ring for dynamic configuration. (Ring of Fire) All this will be hosted on Linux with the Eagle virtual environment manager.

The Microsoft iPod

Since the DRM infested Vista is being launched today, this is well worth reposting.

Spandau Ballet Gold petition

Add your name to the petition to make Spandau Ballet's 'Gold' the national anthem of the UK.

David Bowie on "Extras"

Ricky Gervais gets treated to a little improv from Bowie

Albinosheep Flash

They're Taking the Hobbits to Isegard
Miko Miko Mouse
Britney Subliminal
Queen
Numa numa
Windows Noises
Badger Badger
Cha Cha Cha
Nerr Body

Monty Python wavs

Monty Python wav files
Big selection of wav files from Monty Python.